Is Your Child Ready for Music Together®?

She whispered “I’m sorry” as she scooped up her son for the third time in ten minutes. He had wandered away from the circle again, this time crawling under the table. He started to run during the Hello Song, and then when we were all galloping around, he had simply laid down on the floor.

His mother looked exhausted; dad looked frustrated. I smiled, because there was nothing to apologize for. He was two. And he was doing exactly what two-year-olds do. Over the years, I’ve seen versions of this moment again and again. A parent’s face that says, Is my child’s behavior okay? Are we disrupting the class? Should I be doing more? Are we ruining this for everyone else?

Sometimes the worry is about distraction. Sometimes it’s about safety. Sometimes it’s simply the fear of being judged. But underneath it all is a deeply human instinct: I want my child to be okay. I want to be a good parent.

What It Actually Looks Like When Children Are Learning

In early childhood, learning doesn’t always look the way adults expect. Young children don’t learn by complying. They learn first by observing, moving, exploring—and yes, sometimes by doing the exact opposite of what we expect. It might look like playing with the edge of the carpet during half the class—and then suddenly joining in for one favorite song.

Expression often doesn’t happen while they are busy taking in the sights, sounds, rhythms, and melodies. It comes later—when they feel safe, and when they are developmentally ready to express what they’ve absorbed. A child who doesn’t sing at all in class likely sings bits and pieces of what they are learning later, at home.

The Most Important Person in the Room Is You

What makes the biggest difference in your child’s experience isn’t whether they sit in the circle. It’s you. When your child sees you singing, moving, and feeling comfortable, they receive a powerful message: This is a place where they belong. Music is something you do, and it is fun! And from that sense of safety and model, their confidence and skills grow.

You Don’t Have to Carry the Responsibility Alone

But what about when they are running and look like they might fall on a baby?

Yes, safety is important. But you don’t have to carry the responsibility alone. Part of my role as the teacher is to hold the container for the class and support everyone’s experience. If a child truly needs intervention for safety or to support the group, I will gently signal to you and guide what’s needed. You won’t be left wondering or guessing. But most of the time, intervention isn’t necessary. You can take a breath.

These classes aren’t about getting every child to behave the same way. They’re about creating a space where children feel accepted exactly as they are—and where parents can relax, connect with their child, and share something joyful together. Trust in the process.

The Moment Everything Shifted

About halfway through that same class, I caught the mother’s eye and quietly said: “You don’t need to keep bringing him back.” She hesitated. “Really?”

“Really. He’s fine. Just enjoy the class.” For the first time all morning, she stopped managing him. She sang. She smiled. She relaxed.

Her son wandered for a while longer. Then, without anyone prompting him, he slowly made his way back. He sat on her lap for a partner song. Not because he was told to. Because he was ready.

More Than a Class

Over time, something beautiful happens. The songs of the session become the soundtrack of life all week long. In class, parents grow more relaxed and find new ways to interact with their child. Trust builds amongst the class members. Children become familiar with the flow of the class and can predict that more fun is coming next. And hesitant families begin to look forward to this shared time each week—not because everything goes perfectly, but because it doesn’t have to.

At the end of that semester, that same mother told me something she hadn’t expected. “I used to feel like I was constantly managing him; it wasn’t fun for me.” She paused. “Now it’s the best part of our week.”

Her son still doesn’t sit in the circle most of the time. He often sits under the table during the lullaby. He laughs every time we fake sneeze. He loves playing the drums and choosing which treat to sing about for “Trot to Grandmas.” At home and sometimes in class he sings the end of phrases in tune. He brings his songbook to his dad to get him to sing his favorite songs. He’s a Music Together kid!

Come As You Are

You don’t need to wait until your child is more outgoing, or more verbal, or has better impulse control.  The only expectation is that you’ll show up—and allow yourself to share the experience with them. Music Together is designed for real children—and real parents. You can come exactly as you are.